Aunt Irma is a jerk.

[korafox]

Posting because this has been a worry regularly punching me in the back of the head for the past several days, and maybe if I write it down it'll help.

There have been a bunch of articles in the news recently about endometriosis, because apparently this is a thing the general public doesn't really know about (the word even has the red squigglies under it from my spell-checker).  I'm glad it's getting publicity so maybe we can come up with better diagnostic/treatment options, and maybe just as important, so people who present with symptoms don't get patted on the head and told to toughen up.

This is not a post about me thinking I have endo.  This is a post about me doing some further research online for what a "normal" period/cramping situation looks like, and going "Uh...bwuh?"

Yes, I know, internet sources for medical information are a level of dodgy in and of themselves even when it's not about something as arcane as the female reproductive system.  But I am baffled to see someone claim that "normal" cramps only last for 1-2 days, after the start of the period.

For perspective, this cycle's cramps for me started two days ago.  I've got a heating pad cradled over my tummy right now because things are hurting/tight enough that standing up straight was causing significant discomfort.  My cycle is regular enough that I know I have about five more days of this before my period even starts, and then things will devolve into curling-up-on-the-floor-sobbing levels of ow, plus about 36 hours of feeling like someone's making pretzels out of my lower spine.  If I forget to take my more-than-recommended dose of Ibuprofen (though actually, Dad-who-is-a-doctor said to take that much) before bed, I can guarantee getting woken up by the pain.

Did I mention I'm on the pill?  (The progestin-only one, because of the potential for migraine triggers, but I am going to try to advocate for trying a low-estrogen one because I'll risk potential pain over certain actual pain, thank you very much.)

So to come around to the point of all this, yes I have my annual OB/GYN appointment in less than three weeks now, and I'm going to try to raise these issues then.  Partly I am writing this so I can pre-articulate what I'm going through so I have even a chance of successfully communicating it.  (And already jerk-brain is poking me and saying, "It's not so bad, you're over-stating it, stop complaining because there are people who bleed three weeks at a time and pass out from the pain.")

But I'm freaking out because the very nice nurse-midwife I had last year, who seemed to treat me like I'm intelligent and listen to me, was booked solid through January when I tried to make an appointment four months in advance.  So I get to start over with someone new and I have no idea if she's going to take me seriously or not.  What I want, what I really really want is to tell these symptoms to the doctor and have her go "Whoa!  That's not right; let's see what we can do about it."  Instead, I'm terrified of getting an eye-roll and being told that this experience is "normal".  Because it has been; it's been my normal for fifteen years and I can't face the prospect of it being my normal for thirty more. 

Comments

[cereta]

Ugh. There are few things worse than losing a medical professional who actually LISTENS and CARES. Crossing my fingers for you on the new person.

Also, if it helps you jerk-brain to shut up, I had consistent dysmenorrhea from the time I was about 15 until I had my hysterectomy, and except for the year+ that I was on heavy-duty fertility drugs, my cramps did not last that long. That is not "normal" in the sense that you should not have to experience it without medical intervention if intervention is what you want.

Best of luck to you. I wish I had advice, but, well, let's just say there's a reason I ended up getting the stupid organ yanked. But let me know if there's anything I can do. Bring chocolate to game, buy you a steak, etc ;).

[korafox]

The additional data point is definitely appreciated. My mom had a similar set of experiences to mine (and had pretty late-onset menopause, so I have that to look forward to *grumblegrumble*), which probably explains a lot.

I kind of wish medical practitioners would stop asking "Is *bodily function* normal?" and start saying "This is approximately what one should expect from *bodily function*; is yours particularly divergent from that?" It would save a lot of grief.

I would give pretty even odds that a day will come when I will want to ask you questions about hysterectomies, but unfortunately today is not that day.

*hugs*

[cereta]

{{hugs}} Any time. And feel free to ask about anything. Odds are good I tried it ;).

[kayote]

My mother also had cramps that put her in bed with a heating pad for several days every month. Hers were resolved when the doc put her on birth control pills (though apparently that was an interesting, repeated, fight with the insurance company. You'd think someone with her tubes tied wouldn't have a hard time proving what the pills weren't for.....)

Mine were not that bad, but certainly not merely 1-2 days. I grew to respect IBProfin and heating pads. Of course, I recall my sex ed in school saying something about 2T of blood total and only a few days long. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[korafox]

Re: the BC pills, wow. I am very thankful they're required by law to cover these things now.

I saw a similar baffling figure for total blood loss, and it was a recent one too. I think it was being bandied about by Diva/Moon-cup enthusiasts. To which I say ahaha nope. My desire to be environmentally friendly does not extend nearly that far; I am happy to let others carry that torch if it works for them.

I bet the sex ed curriculum was just trying to keep the people who hadn't gotten theirs yet from freaking out. ;-)

[kayote]

I tried one of those Diva Cups and couldn't make it work and it seemed awkward anyway.

However, I really recommend LunaPads (cotton pads). Chafing was a problem for me and isn't since I switched. Also, I don't have to worry about running out and spending money all the time.