korafox: Dahlia holds up a book, a rainbow shooting out of it.  Text: READ ALL THE BOOKS (reading rainbow)
I actually remembered to get in line at the library for the third book of the Fitz and the Fool trilogy, and last Friday my hold number came up.  We only get the book for two weeks, so Husband and I are reading it at the same time. 

The Fool is still the best and I want to give him all the hugs.  Robin Hobb is seriously meaner to her characters than I am. (Yes, really.)  : P

Also I love that Fitz is finally, finally over himself enough to not freak out at the Fool's gender fluidity and fluidity of personalities generally.  In the first-person POV, he uses different pronouns and names for the Fool in the same paragraph and I can't stress enough how right this feels.

(I kind of want to write a fanfic of this titled Harlequin Romance but I have no idea what it would be about other than the obvious.)

korafox: (kilian)
Have returned from the bridal shower/in-law extended family get-together in Wisconsin.  As always, I'm still recovering a bit from the culture shock.  The worst was a moment of sheer dissonance when I looked around at the room with 30 or so people crammed into it and realized "holy hells, they are all doing femininity so hard I do not speak this language halp".  Like, I can do the small talk and the cooing over precious shower gifts (and one of the aunties kept complimenting me on my short haircut, hooray!) but there is just this pose with the makeup and the wispy sundresses and the heels and I cannot assume it.  When I have to, for an actual formal event, I get about two hours before I feel like crawling out of my own skin for the unfamiliar confines of a dress and face paint and the change in body language they demand.

I wish I had the courage to wear my pant-suit and vest to the wedding this summer.  I can't describe how wonderful it felt when I wore that to an event Husband and I went to at the university.  Formal clothes!  That I can move like myself in and feel swanky at the same time!  And if it were my extended family instead of Husband's (and not the culture of teeny farming community, rural Wisconsin), I might very well.  But I don't want to do something that would pull attention at the wedding of a cousin-in-law.  Not my day.

We also had a graduation party the same evening, and almost had a tent fall on us after a sudden severe thunderstorm blew up.  It was raining so hard and horizontal that nothing under the tent, even on the opposite side from where the rain was coming in, stayed dry.  One of the corner poles did indeed fall down, but luckily the whole thing didn't collapse. 

So yes.  Lots and lots of people.  So many people, so much talking.  My head did not do so well this weekend, but I think I'm mostly recovered today with getting to stay home and just read quietly.  Today I also hit Wanikani level 30, and have now officially learned 1,000 kanji!  That means I'm halfway to being able to read a newspaper.  : P

And now I will stop dithering about, and work up the guts to do some color tests for the Swan Daughter painting (pencils are done).  Maybe.  Hopefully.  Why is watercolor so scary.

korafox: (RAWR)
The good news: My van is still technically driveable. 

The bad news: I had to take my van to a mechanic for making funky engine noises, and it turns out part of the exhaust system is rusted through.  This means that I don't get to use the heat (the A/C was already broken), and I have to crack the windows while I drive because otherwise I might die of carbon monoxide poisoning.  Fixing the problem on this 15-year-old vehicle would have cost about a grand (and we just shelled out a similar amount to fix the other vehicle last Friday), and that is $1000 that is much better spent on a new car.

So, sometime after the holidays, I am going to get to learn the joys of buying a car.  I am just thrilled at this prospect, of course, and am already having anticipatory sticker shock.

To counteract this crappy, crappy day, however, husband gave me my Christmas present early.

He got me a vest!!!  A snazzy vest that actually fits me!!!  I have no words for how much the dapper genderqueer side of me is jumping up and down for joy right now.  I am looking forward to having an occasion to wear it.   So much love to husband, who knows I would never have been able to buy this for myself.  : )

korafox: (lilacs)
So one of the gifts I received from future mom-in-law for Christmas was a new sleepset (something which I desperately needed...the cat has been methodically tearing apart every pair of pajama pants I own, lap-snuggle by lap-snuggle).  Now, this new set of clothes is two things: very, very, purple and also, unmistakably girly (there's sparkly stars on the pants and pink lace on the cuffs, for crying out loud).  Those who know me understand that my wardrobe runs the gamut from fairly masculine (men's button-down shirts) to neutral (T-shirts, o God how I love them), and even includes some fairly feminine blouses and, yes, shockingly, a few dresses.  But even the feminine articles of clothing are fairly mature and sedate, things I would describe as women's clothing.  This sleepset...ye gods, I put it on and my heart just about stopped with the realization that I looked like a fifteen year old girl.  Which is ironic, considering that at fifteen I probably dressed more masculinely than I do today.  

There is a disclaimer in here that I don't mind seeing people dress up "girly".  (The sorts of things they push as fashion for girls is a whole 'nother kettle of fish, however.)  But that is oh, so not for me.  I am looking forward to obtaining a job in my chosen profession so that I can wear a uniform with trousers every day to work.  For the time being, I will assuage my admittedly variable genderqueerness with my favorite two-sizes-too-big button-down shirt.

September 2017



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