korafox: (kilian)
Have returned from the bridal shower/in-law extended family get-together in Wisconsin.  As always, I'm still recovering a bit from the culture shock.  The worst was a moment of sheer dissonance when I looked around at the room with 30 or so people crammed into it and realized "holy hells, they are all doing femininity so hard I do not speak this language halp".  Like, I can do the small talk and the cooing over precious shower gifts (and one of the aunties kept complimenting me on my short haircut, hooray!) but there is just this pose with the makeup and the wispy sundresses and the heels and I cannot assume it.  When I have to, for an actual formal event, I get about two hours before I feel like crawling out of my own skin for the unfamiliar confines of a dress and face paint and the change in body language they demand.

I wish I had the courage to wear my pant-suit and vest to the wedding this summer.  I can't describe how wonderful it felt when I wore that to an event Husband and I went to at the university.  Formal clothes!  That I can move like myself in and feel swanky at the same time!  And if it were my extended family instead of Husband's (and not the culture of teeny farming community, rural Wisconsin), I might very well.  But I don't want to do something that would pull attention at the wedding of a cousin-in-law.  Not my day.

We also had a graduation party the same evening, and almost had a tent fall on us after a sudden severe thunderstorm blew up.  It was raining so hard and horizontal that nothing under the tent, even on the opposite side from where the rain was coming in, stayed dry.  One of the corner poles did indeed fall down, but luckily the whole thing didn't collapse. 

So yes.  Lots and lots of people.  So many people, so much talking.  My head did not do so well this weekend, but I think I'm mostly recovered today with getting to stay home and just read quietly.  Today I also hit Wanikani level 30, and have now officially learned 1,000 kanji!  That means I'm halfway to being able to read a newspaper.  : P

And now I will stop dithering about, and work up the guts to do some color tests for the Swan Daughter painting (pencils are done).  Maybe.  Hopefully.  Why is watercolor so scary.

korafox: (RAWR)
Possibly one of the more aggravating things about Husband having a very large family is that we are going to spend the next twenty years attending cousins' weddings.  The aggravating part not being the weddings themselves, but the fact that apparently despite his family being the small-towniest people who ever lived, they can't fricking pass the message that I DIDN'T CHANGE MY NAME. 

Extra snark for the save the date card that just arrived, which was addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. Hisfirstname Hislastname".  I don't even get to keep my first name now apparently. 

(One, count it one, cousin has so far gotten this right without needing correction, but they are on the other side of Husband's family.  Although they did misspell my last name on the invitation.  But it's the thought that counts.)

I mean, seriously, you all were at our wedding.  Did you not pay attention to the part at the end where the priest announced our names separately,  preserving both our last names?  Is this some sort of passive-aggressive values judgment, or just cluelessness?

It is a small thing but it is MY NAME dammit.  Names are important.

September 2017



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